10
Mar
From March 26th to 28th will be the Spring Fling Afterburn Festival in Second Life, where I am regularly scheduled to perform on
March 26th, 23:00 UST (3:00 PM PST)
March 27th, 08:00 UST (12:00 AM PST) and
March 28th, 08:00 UST (12:00 AM PST)
I’d like to use this opportunity to give my first cross-grid peformance, streaming and playing at the same time on both OSGrid and Second Life. Thus, the performance will take place in Second Life on one of the Burning Life Sims (location not published yet, but probably on the stage on Guru) and in OSGrid on Ever 011 .
Performance on 26th will last 1 hour, on 27th and 28th 2 hours, yet I will probably play somewhat longer on Ever 01, as we don’t have a schedule to adhere to there. So, you are all welcome to join me on one (or ALL) of the above dates and have a great time.
- Please click the link when being logged into OSGrid to bring up the correct landmark. Alternatively, look for Ever 01 on the map and teleport to coordinates 128, 128, and you should be very close to where you’re supposed to be [↩]
10
Mar
Happy anniversary, love! Every month I wonder what the next one will be like. Will it still be the same? Will our love be different? Will the cares of the world have eaten away at us enough to change who we are? And every month, I find that we are stronger, our love deeper and I still want MORE! More of you, more of what you are, more of WHO you are, more of what WE are! It seems with each passing month our love is reaffirmed. We see how “we” have always been and it serves to let us know we will always be. We learn that our love is REAL in any world or form it takes. It consumes us. It IS us. It is who we are!
The happiness and joy you bring me are greater than any words can express and so with that in mind, I make a feeble attempt to once more chronicle my love for you!
IN THE STILL OF THE NIGHT
My lover comes to me in the still of the night
Bringing remains of the harsh sun
We meet and we laugh, sometimes we cry
As we wait for the dawn of light to steal us away
My lover comes to me in the still of the night
Sleep still on his brow, worries not yet met
His concern is for me, always for me
And he holds me until peace replaces my pain
My lover comes to me in the still of the night
Excitement dripping from his lips
We drive and we walk, we fly and we surf
Falling ever deeper into each other’s soul
My lover comes to me in the still of the night
His fingertips trembling as they touch my body
Our souls unite as our lips embrace
And the wonderment of what is “us” takes over once more
My lover comes to me in the still of the night
His smile leading the way
And nothing but his arms will satisfy me
Leaving me eternally filled and forever longing
Come to me, my love.
9
Mar
My precious V,
I am SO blessed to have you in my life. Your love and kindness always amazes me. I am always astounded that you even find me worth your time, but not only do you do that…you consider me of the greatest worth! You have NO idea how your love has transformed my life, my sweet husband. And while I LOVE to hear your soft words of love towards me and will gladly accept them, I KNOW that I am the real winner in it all!
FOREVER yours….D
[2010/03/08 14:36] Vanish Firecaster: Thank you, *****.
El Firecaster: I wish I could take credit for something, love…I will gladly accept it….but I always feel like the one who is grateful!
Vanish Firecaster: Mmmmh. Well, you let me take you; let me have you the way I want. You are always dressing so beautifully for me, so special. You are caressing me, loving me.
El Firecaster smiles at him. How could I do anything else, love???…I LOVE you! I WANT all those things!
Vanish Firecaster: Yes. But you GIVE so much.
El Firecaster: I guess just as it is hard for you to understand when I tell you that it has not always been so….and you think it is SO natural for it to be the way it is now… that is the same way I feel. It is SO natural how could it be any different?
Vanish Firecaster: Still, I am grateful. And I feel you need to be thanked.
El Firecaster: I remember once walking with you…. and you so despondent…..over lost memories….and I told you we would make new ones and we have. And now those old memories….the ones we thought were SO great at the time PALE in comparison!
Vanish Firecaster: Yes. It’s not even the memories. It is what you are HERE and NOW. Every time anew. I’m so grateful for that.
El Firecaster nods…Me too, baby!
Vanish Firecaster: And I think it’s important to say thank you.
El Firecaster kisses him. Yes. I do too!…caresses him again….. running her fingers thru his hair softly.
Vanish Firecaster: It is so nice just to lay with you.
El Firecaster: God….I KNOW!…it is always SO wonderful!
Vanish Firecaster: So peaceful, so easy to feel at home.
El Firecaster: and I was thinking of that as I wrote the TD about the long walks at night…it IS very similar to that feeling…. SO calm like everything has stopped for that moment.
Vanish Firecaster: Yes. Yes, indeed. God…. We will do that, love.
El Firecaster: Will we?
Vanish Firecaster: We will.
El Firecaster: I was amazed to find out that you had experienced the same thing and I had never told anyone about what I THOUGHT as I walked thru the night…I was afraid they would think I was a FREAK!
Vanish Firecaster: I had to re-read what it says about your psychological type. We are SO similar.
El Firecaster giggles…What does it say?
Vanish Firecaster: It says you are dedicated to what you believe important. That you are extremely loyal. That most people will not understand you, because…your mind is so enigmatic… ..so full of wonders… …which you don’t understand yourself most of the time… …you just live in a world full of exciting things…
El Firecaster: It IS kind of a wonderland in there sometimes!
Vanish Firecaster: Sometimes?
El Firecaster: Ok ok ok…MOST of the time!
Vanish Firecaster: Mmmmh. You ARE perfect for me.
El Firecaster kisses him, nuzzling at his neck.
El Firecaster: Yes. I KNOW that! There is NO doubt in my mind.
Vanish Firecaster: Yes. I just discover more and more wonderful things.
El Firecaster whispers in his ear… I will be fresh and new for you everyday, love. I will be EVERY woman for you. I CAN do that. I have just never been allowed to do it before.
Vanish Firecaster: I know. I know, ***. That’s the thing. I KNOW that! And you ARE! That’s the wonder of it all. I will NEVER tire of you, because one lifetime is not enough to see all your facets.
El Firecaster giggles…Am I like a sculpty prim?
Vanish Firecaster: You are like the… …Eagle Stone……each facet catching the light in its unique way…
El Firecaster: awwww…. From “Gem”?
Vanish Firecaster: Yes.
El Firecaster kisses him softly, nuzzling at his ear…whispering….I love you….
Vanish Firecaster smiles softly, caresses her cheeks gently.
[2010/03/08 15:00] El Firecaster: welllll…..I still feel like I am the winner in it all!
8
Mar
My Precious Lover,
Thank you for loving me enough to care about WHY I don’t sleep. It is not just that you care because I can’t, but you want to know why. I don’t even remember the last time anyone cared about that. It once again just lets me know how much you love me and what I mean to you. To hear your soft voice tell me over and over how much you love me….oh love….you have NO idea how much that means to me, the words are NEVER wasted. They sink down into my spirit and find haven with all the other tender mercies you have shown to me. You have NO IDEA how my soul leaps each time I hear you call my name. I memorize the way it sounds, each inflection burning into my heart. It seems to roll from your lips, as though it has always been there.
Thank you so much, love for sharing with me the mundane conversations of life. I do SO enjoy them. I LOVE to hear your thoughts and opinions, to see how that beautiful mind of yours works and with each thing you show me….I am almost in awe, as I read it and touch it and know that you have been there before me….that something in that article or on that page or in that song…moved you…touched you. It is almost sacred to me, love. When you talk of your life and your past, it moves me SO….wishing I had been there….and then realizing that I was. I was there with you, love on those long walks in the dark. As the light reflected in shards across the path, did you see my shadow there? I WAS there, holding your hand…waiting….waiting…walking the same path in another time and another place, looking for you, feeling the calm…..that same peace that we feel after our bodies are spent….thinking the SAME thoughts…having the SAME longings. We TRULY are bonded, love.
I am SO grateful that we are able to share our world together. You are right, it WAS made for us, and few of the others will ever understand it. I can be ME there and yes, even wear green hair! Thank you for loving me thru all my “stages” and for being beside me as I go though them all. We will explore and learn and grow together. I will gladly be your “rebellious” little Irish lass long after St. Patrick’s Day is over. And when we have spent 10 more St. Patrick’s Days together, I KNOW that our love will still be as fresh and vibrant as it is now. IT never grows old or dies, it simply moves from one reality to another…immer.
7
Mar
His soft voice sang to her. She lay on the blanket beside him, trying to listen intently. It was SO hard when all she could do was think about how the sound of his voice moved her. They had talked of everyday things….his life…her life….their life. And before long, the talk turned to politics. She always cringed when it happened; remembering that one of their first disagreements had been over politics. She KNEW you were never supposed to talk of politics or religion, but they had broached religion on several occasions and done fine, WHY was politics different? She thought it probably had to do with their upbringing more than anything else. They WERE born and raised in two different COUNTRIES after all! At last she decided to tackle it, considering herself to be a little more open minded than she used to be.
She listened to him talk, discussing things that she had always wanted to know but had never taken the time to look up. He was SO knowledgeable and it left her feeling somewhat inadequate. She was amazed at the way he quickly answered all her questions, never hesitating, never needing to think or check facts, it was like it was all neatly stored away inside his beautiful head just waiting to be needed. There was something very comforting about it, yes…..even sexy…that she was with a man that could out do her…that could hold his own and never waver…that immediately had an answer for her every question…and not just any answer….a VERY detailed one. They talked of history and culture and the current state of affairs. It felt as though EVERY era that he discussed was fresh and new…as though he had LIVED it…their conversation spanning over a hundred years. She had almost begun to wonder if perhaps he WAS some mythical, magical creature that never died….maybe a vampire even! He seemed to bring LIFE to every time period! But then, he did that with every conversation they had. She adjusted herself on the blanket trying to find a way, without being rude, to tell him how turned on she was and how badly she needed him. She stifled the urge to ask him any more questions and instead told him how incredibly sexy he was. She could hear the puzzlement in his voice as he asked her why? And she had no way to adequately describe to him what he did to her or how he made her feel. All she could think of was…yes…they could talk of politics AND religion and it would always end up at the same place….in his arms!
6
Mar
Why would I ever want other arms to comfort me, when I have these? I have heard of other partners that have pushed their loved ones away, encouraged them to “go out”, even WANTED them to find another, feeling that they were not enough. I have pondered it. SO much is made out of reality and what’s being missed. REALLY?
Never in all my life have I felt love like I do now. Every day when I see you, my eyes light up, a smile instantly coming to my face as I feel the weight of the world lifted from my shoulders. Any aches and pains I may have seem to disappear for that moment in time… the world stops turning… and all is right.
When I lay in your arms it feels as though all the things that have been wrong in my life are gone, magically fixed by your love. My heart seeks yours to beat as one and my breathing slows to match yours, my mind lulled by your sweet words. As we laugh and talk, all the cares and burdens of the “real world” seem to slip away and ALL that is left is us…NOTHING else matters. The soft sound of your voice truly sings to my soul, bringing it home to your loving embrace. When I look into your deep brown eyes and see the love there, it truly brings tears to my heart, KNOWING that I am loved like that by another, KNOWING that in the REAL WORLD, someone would care for me and want me like that…just as I am. When I hear you laugh….oh love….it means SO much to me! To know that I have brought joy to your life, have lightened your countenance…what more could I want?
And when things turn passionate, as they always do, I experience love and longing as I never have before. The touch of your hands on my body excites me as none other….your kiss arousing me to new heights….and when at last, our bodies have had all they can handle and we fall spent in each other’s arms, the sound of your breathing returning to normal, in sync with mine, lets me know, that we are forever bonded, joined in a way that few individuals will EVER understand or have the experience of knowing.
WHY would I ever need anything else? I have spent my entire life looking for you, why would I ever WANT anything else? I don’t know what the future holds, what twists and turns fate may bring us, or WHERE I will be in 10 years. The only thing I know, is that NO MATTER WHAT, I am FOREVER yours and that whatever world or state I find myself in at that time, I will either be WITH or will be searching for you again. YOU will always be in my life, my constant, the one true love, that never ends. Why would I EVER want anything else?
5
Mar
She sat in the dentist chair terrified! MULTIPLE MAJOR surgeries did not scare her like one little dentist could! She looked at all the instruments laid out on the tray, most prominent the needle and syringe. She was CERTAIN it was MUCH bigger than it looked…it MUST have taken up the whole tray! She could feel her heart racing, pounding in her ears and her foot started to shake…almost in time, to a song unheard. She soon realized the entire chair was shaking in the same rhythm and she quieted her foot, TRYING to think of him. “I will be there with you, love.” he had told her, very matter-of-factly. “I will hold your hand.” She smiled to herself as she remembered the promise he made to her if she was a “brave little girl”. As much as she wanted the prize, bravery seemed to fail her right now. She wondered why it was so easy for him? When she promised to be with him, he always said…”Oh I know…you are NEVER far.” and she KNEW he meant it. WHY was it SO hard for her? SHE was the intuitive one! SHE should be the one to feel it! And then she thought about him and figured that once he accepted something as fact, it was so! There was no questioning it…no wondering…it WAS so! And she felt comforted, reminding herself that “a double minded man is unstable in all his ways”. She was SO grateful that he was not like that. There was no swaying, no uncertainty, she never had to worry that she would come to him one day and find that everything was different. It was ALWAYS the same…and she LOVED it. It was a trait that she was not used to! And it had brought so much stability to her life. She knew she could count on it, she could trust him, and she could rely on what he said. When he told her that he loved her and would ALWAYS love her, she knew it was true. When he told her that he would ALWAYS take care of her and provide for her, she knew he meant it. And she he said he would do ANYTHING to keep her, she knew that anything…meant ANYTHING. It was his nature, it could mean nothing else.
She watched the dentist with the kind face and soft voice come at her with the HUGE needle. “May I listen to some music?” she asked, trying not to cry. “Sure. We have lots of people do that.” the dentist chirped. She reached down to turn on her MP3 player, her hands trembling SO bad she could barely maneuver the buttons. The dentist administered the shots with grace and ease, several of them causing no pain at all. And when, what seemed like the majority of her face, was numb, it was time to start and she knew she would have to hear the sound of that awful drill. She turned the music up and held on for dear life, her hands gripping the arms of the chair, when suddenly she felt it. She had closed her eyes and opened her mouth trying to relax as much as possible listening to the music:
Amor, amor vincit omnia
I’ll never let anything or anyone come between us.
Never let anything or anyone, no.
It was tender, yet firm…a gentle hand resting on hers. She took a deep breath and let his touch and the music take her to the many lifetimes they had shared. She had felt it many times before. Nothing comforted her more than to wake and find him in her bed. She closed her eyes once more, knowing that the dentist was hard at work and she listened to the words once again…it was true….love DOES conquer all.
4
Mar
[2010/03/02 3:53] Vanish Firecaster: I love the TD.
[2010/03/02 3:54] Vanish Firecaster: It’s the first thing I look for when I wake.
It means SO much to me, love, to know that the first thing your eyes read each morning is how much I love you. May your first thoughts each day be of me and how much you mean to me…to know that I am anxiously waiting for your embrace. When you read the words I have written may they awaken your mind from its’ slumber with kisses of desire. May the words bring a smile to your face and warm your heart, causing your body to ache for me. And of course, when we do finally meet, may your dreams become realities as we live them together.
And as is the way with my friend TIME…it is too soon over and the cares of this world necessitate us to part….but while you are away…remember I am never far…always hiding under the desk or sitting next to you in the car, listening to EVERY WORD you say…..waiting for you to return to me and satiate my longings!
As your day closes to an end, we are once again privileged to find one another…recounting the tales of the day…the dreams we dreamt….the things that caught our interest…sharing with one another things that most likely others would find boring…but things that mean the world to us! Most of the time all we care to do is lie in each other’s arms and find our bearings…but on those occasions that we have things to do or choose to do…we always make sure…that there is time for us to express our love one to another…at LEAST once!
And as once again the time comes for us to say goodbye…I kiss your sleepy eyes…as I listen to your calm breathing…placing your hand over my heart…holding you close…praying that the last conscious thought your beautiful brain would have, would be of me and the love I have for you, knowing…that we have come full circle once again.
As I wrote earlier, There.com will close on March 9th. I also wrote that many of their users might probably go to Second Life afterwards, as their approach at virtual reality is similar. But is Second Life really an alternative for There?
I have been at this point several times in the past, only approaching it from the opposite direction, and asked myself for alternatives to Second Life. It is the purpose of this article to compare my view on other virtual worlds than There and Second Life, and perhaps serve as a guidance for refugees from both worlds.
I am limiting my comparison to the ‘Second Life’ model of virtual worlds. This model shares the following traits:
- There is no overall ‘theme’ or ‘goal’ to the virtual world, and it is not a ‘game’, but rather can serve as a platform for such.
- The virtual world does (or can) have an in-world economic model
- The virtual world enables its users to create content themselves
Thus, I did not include many of the most popular MMORPG’s like World of Warcraft, EVE Online, or even Entropia Universe (which is sometimes traded as the hottest alternative to Second Life, but which has been left out here because of the gaming aspect and the fact that there is no way to step out of the ‘theme’).
Another point to note is that most virtual worlds do not display their user statistics, so there is no telling how easily and how many people can be met when signing up to that world, unless you become an active part in it. I did not try all these worlds myself, but merely collect them here as a reference and comparison guideline.
Active Worlds is unique (or near-unique) as it allows access not only through a client software, but also through a browser plugin. Personally, I believe this is overrated, even though there seems to be a consensus that ‘people don’t want separate clients for different aspects of the internet’ and prefer to have everything inside their browsers. This view leaves aside the fact that web browsers aren’t eternal themselves, and are subject to change as the technology changes. (Who knows, maybe Viewers will be the next browsers?)
Other than the browser plugin feature, Active Worlds looks really ugly from the outside, and the avatars aren’t nowhere near as good as in Second Life (even though they are a far cry from the avatars in There). Also, their community guidelines prohibit “material containing nudity, pornography, or sexual material of a lewd, lecherous or obscene nature and intent”, which is a showstopper to me, as these contents are all part of the human life (and a most enjoyable part actually) and something I enjoy virtually as well. So all in all, it’s not a place I’d like to be.
On the other hand, the chinese online world HiPiHi seems to come closest to Second Life in terms of graphics and content creation. Actually, it is so similar that it’s hard not to think of a Second Life Copycat, even though HiPiHi creator Hui Xu states otherwise that “it is absolutely a misunderstanding of the virtual world if people think HiPiHi is a copycat of SecondLife”. Due to the nature of HiPiHi, most of its users are chinese, so the real issue with it will probably be language barriers. And then, why switch to a virtual world that is just like SL anyway?
IMVU is another virtual world whose user base seems to be quite large (the website talks about ‘millions of users’ and shows around 100.000 users ‘online right now’). Their avatars, again, look worse than Second Life (and childish, in a way). Actually, ALL competitors seem to share this common drawback, even though SL avatars are believed to be ugly already (probably in comparison to MMORPGs which feature expertly created avatars and great graphics, but nowhere near the creative options of virtual worlds).
Kaneva is another world with ugly avatars and terrible graphics, and even the website doesn’t feature much (or ANYTHING at all) about why I would want to join it in the first place. Actually, it is getting tedious of seeing this trait over and over, as virtual worlds all offer the same ‘meet friends, chat, create, have fun’ scheme without offering something unique that would give people reason about why to join THIS world in the first place.
Maybe it’s just me, but the avatars of Onverse look so freakish to me that I actually am afraid to join it. They are probably meant to be comical, but for some reason give me the creeps. Also, this ‘funny’ approach prevents users from creating a really beautiful virtual persona, which is a huge incentive that shouldn’t be overlooked. Other than that, more of the same.
Then, of course, there is Blue Mars, which, from its onset, offers much better graphics, more professional building tools, allegedly better performance and (by now, at least) cheaper prices than Second Life. A massive drawback right now might be the small user base, and the demanding system requirements.
And finally, there’s the Red Light Center, which is an exception in this list as there doesn’t seem to be a way to create content yourself. I just included it here as a curiousity, because it is exclusively aimed at the ‘adult’ side of virtual worlds and gives its residents plenty of opportunities to dance and have intimate encounters. The point here is again: Why settle for ‘just this’ when you can have the same things at the same graphics quality in Second Life as well, and so much more?
While there are some promising alternatives (Blue Mars, HiPiHi), Second Life remains the standard in today’s virtual worlds, and will provide its users with the largest possible creative freedom and customization as well as sporting a gigantic user base. However, SL has its drawbacks, too. As There.com shows, virtual worlds are dependent on commercial success, without which they will cease existing. This is true for all of the above, and thus sets them at the same risk as There, which already backed Adam Frisby’s first prediction for 2010.
To sidestep this risk, there is the very narrow path of taking part in an open sourced project at creating standardized virtual world software, called Open Simulator. Is is a non-commercial project (and thus independent of commercial success) and aims at openness and intercompatibility. Currently, it is fully compatible with the Second Life viewer software, thus enabling anyone who is familiar with Second Life to access one of the many OpenSim Grids and enjoy the same graphics and features as SL itself (plus a few extra, such as megaregions and megaprims).
The biggest of these Grids is OSGrid, which is also the most ‘open’ as it enables anyone to connect their own servers to their grid, and test and play with the software in any way they like, without being restricted by terms of service. The one thing to keep in mind is, however, that the user base of OSGrid is very very small in comparison to Second Life (around 100 users online at all times in OSGrid, when over 60.000 are online in SL). Thus, OSGrid and OpenSim are certainly not for everyone, but rather a viable alternative for those who feel SL is too restrictive, expensive or not innovative enough to be exciting.
3
Mar
There is over. For some reason I can’t resist that pun, but it’s actually grave news for the Metaverse. There.com was launched in 2003, about the same time as Second Life. Both had similar concepts and shared common traits, such as an in-world economy and user-created content. Unlike SL however, There was aimed to be PG-13 rated and therefore open for everyone (where SL is basically an adult world with an attached Teen-Grid). When I joined SL, I had tried various other virtual worlds as well, including There (and I again did so after getting banned from SL). Personally, to me There had some really bad graphics (which were way worse than Second Life) and that put me off before I even got to know how the community was like, or understood that adult content was disallowed there. In hindsight, of course I’m glad I didn’t move there, as I would need to move again now.
However, I still have mixed feelings about this. Mike Wilson, CEO of Makena Technologies (the providers of There.com) wrote in the statement that announced the closing the very true and revealing sentence: “There is a business, and a business that can’t support itself doesn’t work.” The people who created content in There, or even had their own businesses based on There’s in-world economy, will lose their creations forever. There, like Second Life, is a walled garden, yet unlike SL there is no open sourced community that is working on a compatible virtual world. In short: Everything will be gone. And while There.com will try to reimburse recently converted Therebucks (There’s in-world currency), everything else will sleep the long sleep of cables.
This, once more, gives me opportunity to think about the concepts of virtual worlds, and which is the best route to follow. As long as your virtual world depends on business, it will rise and fall with the economy. It is nice to think it won’t happen to SL, as it is too big and economically strong, but the current crisis has brought even bigger giants down. I’m not saying I have reason to believe SL will close. I guess my point is just that, as long as it is in the hands of an economic business, its fate is doubtful. (Would the internet ever have grown to what it is today, if it would have been backed by a capitalist venture?) The new black is Blue Mars, which just launched its Beta a few months ago. Many people are putting a lot of effort and creativity into it now. Will it work? Will it survive and honour those that contributed? I would hate to put my heart into creating things there, only to see it close because of economic reasons. I wish it all the best, but it’s still the same fear as with Second Life, and every other business virtual world.
Many players of There will probably switch over to Second Life, and I welcome them with all my heart, and hope they will find a place that is just as great, or even greater, than There was. However, I would even more like to see them in OSGrid or in another non-commercial open simulator grid. Not just because every new face there is refreshing, but also, because I believe these are the foundations built to last. From what I have come to learn is that: If you don’t NEED to make business, don’t try. It removes a lot of pressure from you, and gives you more room to breathe. Also, only the things you share can never be lost. Because they can be shared back with you at any time. If you keep them to yourself, they are vulnerable to loss due to unforeseen circumstances.
THERE for: Welcome Therians. We salute you.